Dog Control
by Scott Harmon

I am no longer a dog person. I have been bitten by these vicious creatures seven times in 22 years, so I would never own one. Unlike my guns, which have never done anything on their own, these assault creatures are self-propelled and do posses rudimentary smart technology. Unfortunately, unlike a true smart weapon, these appear to be "sic and forget" weapons.

Last year I was walking with my two small daughters no more than 150 yards from my house. A person (no doubt unregistered and untrained) came around the corner accompanied by the equivalent of a 30 mm cannon type dog. This dog easily weighed in at over 175 pounds and stood about 4 ft high at the shoulder. Now, there is simply no reason, either for environmental reasons or for self defense, to have a vicious creature like this. Furthermore, the dog was UNRESTRAINED, even though Dallas has a strict dog lock and chain law. This animal saw us, altered his course, and headed straight for us, ears back. I asked the man to stop the dog. He told me "Don't worry, he doesn't bite" (which I interpret the same as "Don't worry, it's unloaded). Unwilling to risk my kids' safety, I put my hand inside my coat and got ready to draw my pistol. This action finally got through to the guy, who ran over, grabbed this deadly creature, and apologizing profusely, left down the street, dog firmly leashed.

I admit I had my anti-dog whistle, mace and cell phone with me, too. I have no doubt the use of those could have stopped the attack had it gone further. I confess my willingness to go for my pistol was a throwback to the caveman mentality no longer needed in today's modern world. I attribute that reaction to my desire to "Save my children".

If any of you are lawyers, let me know; I am sure PETA will file on me for causing damage to the dog's psyche.

Scott Harmon